40 Year Old Virgin Quotes

"She had hands as big as Andre the Giant, and she had an Adam's apple as big as her balls."
Andy

Trish: "Do you have protection?"
Andy: "I don't believe in guns."

"Really? All your girlfriends wanted to have sex with virgins too? That's funny... I didn't even know you g-girls talked like that. I think my first time might be your best time too. Well I knew it, you know what? I knew that you'd react that way and I knew that you would want to lead me through my first sexual encounter will all the compassion and care that someone would give to their soulmate."
Andy

"Know how I knew you were gay? You like Coldplay."
David

"If she starts waxing his pubes, I'm outta here."
Cal

"Do you know how I know you're gay? Because you are holding each other ever so gently."
Haziz

"He sold his old toys for over half a million dollars! We gotta get some toys!"
Jay

"I touched a guy's balls once in Hebrew School."
Cal

"Keep your bitch on a leash."
Andy

"From now on, your dick is my dick. I'm gonna get you laid."
Jay